


Mindful

by CottonCandyWhump



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Buck angst, Gen, Post Lawsuit, rape mention
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-06
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-01-24 12:22:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21338173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CottonCandyWhump/pseuds/CottonCandyWhump
Summary: “It’s just… I don’t know. I’m not sure if I even want him around anymore.”“Bobby!” Athena yells. Bobby stops, turning to look at her. Instead he sees Buck in the doorway with a wrapped box, looking stricken.
Comments: 22
Kudos: 196





	1. Chapter 1

Sighing, Bobby looks at the clock. It was seven, thirty minutes after Buck was supposed to be there for supper. 

“He still not here?” Athena asks, heading into the room.

“No. I don’t know what I expected to be honest. He’s always like this.”

“Always like what?”

“Irresponsible! He’s always late and he never even thinks about how his actions affect other people and he’s so stupid and just argh!” Bobby cuts himself off with a frusterated yell. “I never should have let him back on the team!”

“Bobby-”

“It’s obvious that none of the rest of them want him there and if they don’t work well together anymore, I should just transfer him out.”

“Bobby-”

“It’s just… I don’t know. I’m not sure if I even want him around anymore.”

“Bobby!” Athena yells. Bobby stops, turning to look at her. Instead he sees Buck in the doorway with a wrapped box, looking stricken. 

“Shit.”

“I um… Sorry I’m late. I got pulled over. I’ll just leave this here for Mae…” he trails off, dropping the box on the table and turning to go.

“Buck, wait.”

“No, it’s uh it’s fine. I’ll put in a transfer first thing tomorrow,” Buck tells him, taking off as soon as he’s finished.

Bobby sighs, putting his head in his hands.

“What do I do now?” He asks Athena, looking up to her for advice.

“Fix it.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Hello? I’m looking for an Evan Buckley. I was told he was transferred here?” Bobby calls, walking into the relatively empty station. The usual sounds of a fire station were absent here and Bobby found himself repressing a shiver at the eeriness.

“And you would be...?” 

Bobby jumps slightly at the sudden voice behind him and turns to look at whoever it is. He finds himself face to face with a tall woman, her dark hair pulled back in a high ponytail, highlighting her stern features.

“Captain Bobby Nash. 118,” Bobby introduces himself, offering a hand for the lady to shake. 

“Lieutenant Megan James,” she introduces herself, ignoring his hand. Bobby puts his hand in his pocket, clearing his throat.

“Is Evan Buckley here? I really need to talk to him.”

“No.”

“He’s not here? I was told-.”

“No, you can’t talk to him. I want my firefighters to be prepared for anything and everything at a moments notice. Distractions aren’t welcome.”

“When can I talk to him?” Bobby asks, trying not to snap at her

“After his shift ends.”

“And when would that be?”

Lieutenant James goes to answer when none other than Even Buckley comes bounding out of the room on the right. 

“Hey, Lieutenant, I found the extra hoses.”

“Good going, Buckley. Take them, to Mitchel,” James tells him, ignoring Bobby.

“Buck,” Bobby starts, seizing his chance. Buck’s head snaps up, staring at Bobby like a deer in the headlights. Bobby feels his face heat up, unsure of what to say.

“You can’t be here,” Evan tells him after a few seconds, leaving with the hose over his shoulder.

“Don’t you have a station to be running?” James asks, looking at him with her hands on her hips.

“I’m not on shift today.”

“Well we are. You have to leave.”

Bobby nods and goes to turn away when James face does a funny twitch and she sighs.

“He’s off at eight tomorrow,” she tells him, her eyes softening in sympathy.


	3. Chapter 3

Buck sighs, fishing around his pocket for his keys. It had been a long day full of drills, training, and rescues, and although Buck wouldn’t have it any other way, he was completely exhausted.

He fiddles with his key for a few seconds before groaning and smacking his hand against the wood.

“Buck.”

The sound of his name being called startles Buck, causing him to jump five feet in the air and drop his keys. He bends down to pick up his keys and when he stands up again, he’s face to face with his old captain. 

“Bobby.”

“Buck, listen. I’m so so sorry. I didn’t mean it, I was just upset that you were late and the food was getting cold and it’s just been so stressful lately and I’m sorry for taking it out on you.”

They stare there for a few seconds, both staring at each other in silence. Bobby holds his breath, waiting for a response.

“Stressful? Things are stressful? Bobby, I’ve been struggling with my addiction, crushed by a firetruck, stuck in a tsunami. Where have you guys been?”

“Your ‘sex addiction’? Buck, come on! We both know that’s a lie, okay? You can be honest with me, Buck!”

“It’s not a lie!” Buck snaps, tears forming in his eyes.

“Buck,” Bobby starts, moving to put a hand on his shoulder. Buck flinches away, stumbling back. Bobby gapes at him, hurt and horror stirring in his stomach. Buck lowers his arm, staring at his former captain.

“It’s not a lie, okay?! Yeah, I like it. Who doesn’t? But I don’t want it all the time, okay? I didn’t want it with the therapist, I told her so, but she didn’t care and I couldn’t stop! And with the police officer a couple days ago? Same thing! I tried to stop and I tried to get her to stop but I couldn’t, okay?! It’s like my mind was saying no and I was saying no but I couldn’t stop, okay?! I tried! I tried so hard to stop!”

Buck cuts himself off with a sob and Bobby resists the urge to step forward and wrap his arms around him. Based on the boy’s earlier reaction, it would cause more harm than good. 

“Buck-.”

“No, it’s fine. You can go.”

“Talk to somebody. Please. I don’t care if it's me, or Maddie, or Hen, or a therapist. Just please, talk to somebody.”

“Please just go.”

“Buck-.”

“Go!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is interested, I made a whump discord server. https://discord.gg/3hp8MRW


End file.
